Thinking about going to the hottest club in town to celebrate your separation from your abusive ex? Bear it in mind. Your online habits after ending a toxic relationship can significantly affect your emotional well-being and possibly your physical safety.
Let's examine some internet advice on taking care of your needs following a split.
Reduce the amount of communication you have.
Placing your phone away is the first thing you should do. It's totally acceptable to miss your ex or to wonder what they're doing after a breakup. However, communication between you two won't magically improve if your relationship is terminated because of negative actions. Also remember that the most typical form of stalking described by survivors is frequent unwanted calls, voicemails, or texts, so you might want to consider banning your ex on your phone as well as through your mobile service provider.
You are the expert on your situation, however, there have been reports of ex-spouses acting out as a result of being blocked. Speak with a counselor or advocate if you are concerned about an ex's volatile behavior. They can help you assess the severity of the issue and create a personalized safety plan.
You're not quite ready to block your ex and erase any evidence of them from your life online. I comprehend. By simply copying their texts, voicemails, and images from your phone onto a flash drive, you may put some distance between you and their memories. If you choose to keep your ex's phone number in your phone, we strongly suggest changing their name. Something like "I Deserve Healthy Love" might be a great reminder if they're blowing you up to get you back or if you miss them and want to reach out. Check to see if your phone has a spam filter you can turn on for that specific number if they continue to bother you despite your attempts to block them.
Beware of Spoofing.
It's crucial to be aware of how technology might be used against you after exiting a relationship with someone who was abusive in any way. We've heard from people whose ex-partners "spoofed," or made up, the caller ID information on the receiver's caller ID to display the numbers of other people, like their parents', siblings', and best friends', numbers. If you answer the phone expecting to speak to your mother but instead hear your ex, it's undoubtedly a hoax call. The easiest fix is to filter all incoming calls and tell your support team that if they want a callback, they must either leave a voicemail or send you a text message with a special code word.
Consider obtaining a new phone number.
If your phone security doesn't seem to be recoverable or if you just can't shake the feeling that your ex is using your phone to stalk you, think about acquiring a new phone with a new, unlisted number.
Disable your GPS and search for external trackers.
If your ex keeps showing up wherever you go, they might be using GPS to track you. Whether you buy a new phone or keep using the one you've had throughout your relationship, think about turning off your GPS until you really need it. If your car has a navigation system, the same rules still apply.
Check for external GPS trackers in your wallet, handbags, and even the pockets and collars of your clothing. You should also look for a GPS tracker in your car. Verify the glove box, center console, trunk, and wheel wells. You might also ask a local mechanic to examine your car for any odd objects.
Change the settings for your email.
We are aware that 36% of college students who are dating have given their partners the passwords to their email accounts, social media accounts, or computers.
Change your password and security questions on all accounts where your ex may have access.
If you have an account on any website, especially one that asks for your banking or credit card information or one that you've used for
Do you still remember all the steps we took to get your phone? Yes, everything of it.
Your ex's emails can be blocked and deleted, reported as spam, and a new email account might be considered. You can also spam with dubious or false emails. especially if you have a new phone number as well. By using that to create a new email account, you can stay protected. For future sensitive transactions, such as banking, legal proceedings, big purchases, school, and the workplace, use your new email address.
Review your social media privacy settings.
The most frequent kind of cyberbullying or harassment that young people in relationships experience is having a partner meddle with their social media profiles. Change your passwords and security settings while banning and deleting your ex because you most likely won't be able to delete your own social media accounts. Similar to that, you ought to think about deleting (or at the very least moving) images of you and your ex from your social media accounts.
In the future, you should also ask your friends to get your consent before they tag you in pictures, use your name as a location, or post about you on social media. Finally, check your privacy settings. Explore the options on each app and platform until you are at ease with them.
Your listed address should be removed.
Enrolling in an address secrecy program can assist in keeping your address off the public record. Speak with a domestic abuse advocate in your area to learn more about the situation in your state. There aren't always address confidentiality programs available, and in certain states, they aren't able to stop a survivor's address from appearing in court documents or voter registration lists.
Bottom Line
Inconveniently, victims of online abuse and harassment are five times more likely to be sexually coerced than to be physically harmed, psychologically tormented, or both, so it's crucial to take safeguards to keep yourself safe online after a breakup. You should be pleased with all you've done to protect yourself up to this point, and perhaps now that the abusive relationship is finished, you can start to heal as well.
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